Linda: A Male No Longer

 Linda: A Male No Longer

I just completed my fifth month on medications for prostate cancer. The doctors thought they got it soon enough that I would not need to have my prostrate removed. A month later I had some more x-rays at my regular doctor’s appointment, the results were not encouraging. The x-rays showed further invasion of the cancer, so the doctor scheduled me for surgery. He was truthful, the prostate would be removed, along with any other organs that the cancer had spread to. Not a hopeful diagnosis.

I checked into the hospital the next morning and was operated on just after 9 A.M. I don’t remember anything until I was taken back to my room later in the day. I had no relatives locally so there was no one to visit me besides my girlfriend. She had tried to get a day off, but they had a big meeting scheduled of which she was an integral part, so she went in. I am sure she would rather be with me, but she was a manager in her company, so was looked up to do what is right. Due to the meeting it would be late today before she could visit. The doctor came in about an hour after I got back to my room to check on me. He had a serious look on his face, so I feared the worse. He checked my vitals, then looked at the incision he had made to do the operation.

He sat down by me and held my hand.

“I had to remove the prostate, then checked to see if the cancer had spread. Your testicles were consumed with it so I had to remove them plus some of you scrotum, making sure that I got all of the malignant tissue.”

I tried to move my hand down there, but he held my hand firmly. My other arm had the I.V. in it so it was strapped to the side of the bed.

“I know this is disturbing, but there was nothing else we could do. Your penis might still function, but there will be no ejaculate and of course you are now sterile, unable to father any children.”

I started sobbing, a nurse came into the room to add a sedative to the IV and I was soon asleep. I woke later that night to see my girlfriend Stacy sitting on the chair in the room. She saw me awake and came over and hugged me. I felt so inadequate, I knew I would lose her, no longer a male and unable to be a husband to her. I started to explain, but she shushed me, “I am not leaving you, we will have to make some other plans, but we will still be together, love can and will conquer all.” I tried many times to broach the subject with her, but she was adamant about not talking about it. She stayed with me until eleven, but had to go since she had to work again tomorrow.

It was a week before I was released, the doctor had tried a testosterone shot to make up for the lack of hormones my body would make. Ten minutes after the shot I was in convulsions on the bed. I woke up in the emergency room, with several doctors working on me. They had to give me a large estrogen shot to offset the testosterone injection, but once that was in my bloodstream I started to come around. In between passing out they had told me I am apparently testosterone intolerant. My body reacting violently to the shot of the hormone. According to the doctors my testicles must not have been producing any testosterone, since my body couldn’t handle it. That in of itself might explain some of my physical characteristics.

It was two days later before I left the ICU, feeling worse than when I went into the hospital for the prostate surgery. Every time I was awake enough to recognize faces Stacy was there with a smile for me and my hand held in hers. The hospital stay lasted for another week, before the doctor told me I could go home. They did another blood test before I was released, my estrogen levels elevated even more.

My doctor had me go to a specialist two days later, again another sample, again the same result. I was examined by her, then after getting dressed she called me into her private office. We talked for a while, with me describing my life, my occupation, and my concerns for the future. She was blunt, you have some decisions to make and soon, the elevated estrogen levels will be making your body more feminine. The large dose they gave you in ICU has worn off now, but your body is still producing excessive amounts of estrogen somewhere. I have no clue where the estrogen is originating from, I want to run a bunch more tests to try and discover its source.

If we can’t find the source, I am afraid you will start showing some more enhancement in your female secondary sex characteristics. Since your body is testosterone intolerant we have no way to control the estrogen amounts or stop the hormone production. I want you to take some time and think this over, if we can’t find the source you may start looking like a female very quickly. Since you are relatively young the hormone will have more effect on you than if you were older. If that happens portraying a male might become very difficult for you, if not impossible in the future.

My next appointment with the specialist is in ten days, the blood test results the same. One test that she had run last time hinted at where the estrogen was coming from. The next day I was scheduled for a MRI, the doctor talking to me about the results right after the scan. I had two ovary like organs, just like a regular female, but nothing else of the female reproductive system. They were the culprits, somehow stimulated into action, possibly after the removal of my testicles, but from the levels of estrogen in my body, they have apparently been at work for quite some time.

I immediately asked about removing them but she advised that I leave them there. Without any hormones, your body cells have nothing telling them what to do, when to repair the cells, in other words your body closes up shop and quits. If you weren’t testosterone intolerant we could keep the estrogen levels minimal, also managing to keep any more enhancement to your secondary sex characteristics from forming.

So if we take out the ovaries you still have to have some type of hormone that would have to be supplemented somehow. Estrogen therapy is adequate at best because we are guessing at what amount to add. The ovaries will moderate there production naturally, unfortunately that is after they have developed your body to that of a female looks wise. I know this is hard to understand and accept, but please take a few weeks and talk it over with someone close before you make any decisions.

Stacy and I talked about it a lot, I was still leaning towards the surgery to remove the ovaries, damn the consequences. Finally Stacy put her foot down. If you persist in doing this she wanted nothing more to do with me. “I would rather have a live and healthy spouse with boobs, etc. then a male that might drop dead at any time. Think this over carefully, I love and care for you a lot, but I will not be a party to your demise. Tomorrow I will meet you after work and I want your decision, then I will decide if I am to still be a part of your life. I am not bluffing, my way or there is no more relationship.” At that she turned and left, no hug, no kiss, no nothing.

I presume I have stepped over the line, now I have to figure out if I can live as a female. I never did decide, much too big of a decision to make on my own. I can see Stacy’s viewpoint, but for me the stakes are much higher. Twenty-five years old, all of those years spent as a male. Now my whole world is turned upside down, the life of a female or a game of Russian roulette.

When Stacy showed up the next day she had a stern look on her face. The look made up my mind, I would go the female route. I told her this, but made sure she understood that I didn’t have a clue about any of this, so I needed her help. I saw a smile, I received a kiss, and then we cuddled for a couple of hours.

Stacy and cuddling were inseparable. After the first time she did it with me, I began to appreciate the practice. No sex innuendos involved, just two people sharing their life with each other, low key, but filled with love.

Unknown to me, Stacy had arranged some time off from work. On a Monday morning she showed up a little past eight A.M. dragging me out of bed. I was rudely shoved in the shower, threatened with a spanking if I didn’t do a good job of cleaning myself, then made to slip on a set of sweats, then rushed off to a destination unknown. When we pulled into the salon parking lot, I looked at her with sheer panic on my face. I started stuttering, you wouldn’t, you can’t, please Stacy this is not right. In the end I was standing at the front of the salon, Stacy telling the receptionist that I had an appointment.

Then when she turned to leave, I got a kiss, then a few words whispered to my ear. “You will be here all day, there is no way out of this, I have your apartment keys, your car keys and your wallet. So put up with it, be good and I will pick you up later when they have finished with you. If I hear one complaint from the ladies working on you I will strip you naked in the middle of the salon and paddle your fanny till it is bright red. That is not a threat, I have been wanting to do it anyway, so go ahead and give me a reason to do it. I had no doubt she would, but a smile did light up my face, I wonder what getting a spanking from Stacy would be like. I did get a funny look from her, followed up by some giggling as she left the salon. From her smirky look I may not get the spanking in the salon, but I am sure she will find another time to administer it.

I was made hair free, a cream rubbed in all over and then wiped off thirty minutes later, my sparse body hair with it. Then hair shampooed and conditioned, followed up with a styling. Not much cut off, but a cute set of bangs came with the cut. Then a bunch of small curlers, wound tight with a thin piece of paper wrapped around the hair before being wound on the curler. When she saturated the curls with a foul smelling liquid I realized I was getting a permanent. I set for a while pondering my fate, repercussions from this bound to last a while. But then fate had dealt me a bad hand already, so whether I suffer now or later not much difference to the overall outcome.

The permanent is neutralized, something that somehow stuck in my mind when Mom and Sis gave each other permanents. Back then salons were not as prevalent, and permanents fairly expensive. My hair is then set on rollers, the look of me in curlers with three different color rollers in my hair quite comical. Then I imagined myself later, having to do this or similar regularly to keep up my appearance. My appearance as a female that is going to take some getting used to.

Under a dryer for the hair to dry, keeping the hair curly when released from the curlers. With the permanent I am sure they will last longer than I wanted. When the timer went off back to the styling chair and the curlers removed, the hair did remain curly almost like a spring stretching out then back into the tight curl. She kept brushing out the curls, finally managing a curly yet feminine style, the bangs curling over my forehead and accenting my eyes even more.

I was focusing on my curly hair, but Penny, my stylist, was discretely marking my ears for earrings. By the time I figured out what she was doing I sported two sets of holes, lasered in so there would never be a problem with them growing closed. A pair of hoops and a set of studs, both in gold were inserted, pretty much guaranteeing a feminine gender look.

Then she moved to my eyebrows, twenty minutes and they no longer looked masculine, there high arch and thinness quite feminine. She applied a light makeup, drawing in the brows a little, then mascara, followed up with some lipstick. The rose pink lipstick looked so good with my coloring. Yeah right, three hours in the beauty salon and I am wallowing in being gender female.

I had to wait up front for Stacy to show up, looking in the many mirrors of the salon, not a hint of me being masculine showed up. Even my taller height, five foot ten inches, did not seem to matter anymore. I had no breasts yet, the image in the mirror kind of straight up and down, but female never the less.

I wondered if I wanted to work out some at the gym, if any changes in my body would make me appear manly. I doubt it, the female hormones being circulated in my body now, making sure that will never happen.

I was ashamed when Stacy came to get me, I couldn’t even look her in the face. The doctor had removed my maleness, but the salon had given me femininity, a much harder pill to swallow. Just losing my testicles was not apparent to people who looked at me, but curly hair, arched eyebrows, and pierced ears did show, anybody looking at me seeing the female that emerged. She paid the bill and dragged me to her car.

The trip back home is in silence, me not knowing what to say, my humiliation at looking so girly, forcing me to withdraw. She dropped me off at my apartment, gave me my house keys and told me she would be right back. I resigned myself to do as she wanted, she still had my car keys and my wallet, leaving me at somewhat of a disadvantage. I plopped myself in the recliner in the living room, trying to figure out what brought on her action today, did she want me as a female now, or is there some other reason.

Twenty minutes later she returned bringing some food to eat. I had to be dragged to the kitchen, I really wasn’t hungry, but she insisted. I played with the food on my plate, mainly just pushing it from one side to the other. During this time she had tried to engage me in conversation, but I only responded in one word answers if at all.

Finally she had enough, I was yanked out of the chair and hauled to the living room. She set on the couch and pulled me down on her lap. Taking both of her hands she held my face where I had to look her in the face. “Now are you going to snap out of this or do I need to persuade you? I need an answer right now, you have moped around, whined at your bad luck, everything instead of facing your situation and doing something about it.”

I said nothing, I know I have been depressed, but there is nothing to be done about things. I feel myself being pulled over, laying on my stomach on her lap. When she yanks down my pants and shorts, I try to stop her, but she has the leverage keeping her one hand in the middle of my back. The swat I felt next shocked me, she is spanking me, a grown man and I am being spanked like a little kid.

I yelled out, she can swing hard, each impact of her hand felt deep inside my flabby butt. I pleaded with her, I tried to move my hand back to my butt to protect myself, only to have her slap my hands away with enough force to make them tingle. This is the first time I have seen Stacy this upset at me. The tears were running down my cheeks in a torrent, my words falling on deft ears. “I will be good, please Stacy stop, please stop.

She eased up for a minute, then asked if I was going to be a good girl and face my problem or did I need some more motivation. I choked up, trying to get all my words out before she started again. “Yes I will be a good girl, dress however you want and be feminine if only you will not spank me anymore.” Then shocked when she handed me a pen and paper and told me to write it down, all of it.

I want you to admit you are a female now, to wear dresses, to wear lingerie, jewelry, makeup, everything a female does. I want you to admit that you love being a woman now, and to be my lesbian lover. I want it all on paper, dated today and what you deserve if you welsh on this as punishment. I reluctantly did as she asked, the mere act of writing it down made it sink in to my disturbed mind, more than if I had just said the words.

She looked it over a couple of times than handed it back to me. “Nope not all here, you have to admit that you are a female now, the male part long gone. For this to work you have to embrace all of what being a female means, not just part of it. If you continued as a male you be just a part male, so to have a decent life filled with friends and romantic partners you need to be female, clothes, makeup, jewelry and most important attitude.

Then you will be able to start living again. This time as a female, whole and complete. Much better than your life before. After numerous corrections to my pledge she finally accepted my written words, folded up the paper and placed it next to her bosom. “There in case I need to remind you of your commitment.”

At that point she stopped talking, took me in her arms and kissed me passionately. I melted in her arms, the spanking had forced some of my concerns to be forgotten, and the kiss had awakened new emotions in me, ones that felt so good. We set there for quite some time, with me laying on her shoulder, her hands holding mine securely and lovingly. She led me off to bed, undressed me and laid me on the bed. I had to twist a little, my butt still quite sore from her spanking. She undressed herself down to panties and bra, then laid next to me. We fell asleep later, in each other’s arms, sleeping soundly until early morning.

I awoke to sweet smells drifting from the kitchen. I used the bathroom, then found a robe at the end of my bed to put on over my nightie, something that Stacy insisted I wear last night. It felt good next to my body, the silky material caressing my skin. When I put the robe on, little chills spread over my body. The robe had caused the nightie to slide over my skin, the warmth and the silky feeling making me feel good. I walked into the kitchen, Stacy looking at me to see if I was going to be a problem. She saw the robe and figured I had made the first concession to my new female gender.

We ate for a while, just nibbling, taking our time to eat her offerings. She asked what I wanted to do today, I shrugged my shoulders, not really having anything special I wanted to do. Then I thought of my new looks, any venturing out will have to be as a female, that changing a lot of things. Stacy could see where I was getting uptight again, her slapping her thigh a warning of what might happen if I didn’t calm down and now.

“Whatever you would like to do is fine with me, I have no desires or wishes. Please remember that this is all new to me, allow me some time to get used to being seen as a female before you immerse me in everything feminine. I will try and comply with your wishes, and as swiftly as possible. I am just so thankful that somehow you are still in my life, I don’t know who to thank for this heavenly gift, but they deserve my deepest and sincerest thanks.”

We finished what she had prepared for breakfast, some fruit and orange juice, then cleaned up. Since she had fixed the meal I tried to do all the clean-up, feeling that it is only right for me to participate since I am now a female in the relationship. Stacy observed, often I would catch a smile on her face, but didn’t do anything unless I needed to know how something was to be done. I never was much for cleaning up, my idea of a good meal was takeout, and cleanup was putting all the containers in the garbage.

The sink this morning contained a lot of glasses, used once then placed in the sink until there was none left on the shelf. Then something had to be done or swear off drinking water.

One time I even purchased a case of bottled water, figuring that would save a lot of washing and putting away. It was a bad idea, the bottled water did not taste that good, the remaining few bottles made the garbage unopened.

I eventually got all the dishes washed, dried and put up where they belong, something that had not happened in weeks.

Back to the bedroom, she had some clothes laid out for me, my eyes focused on the dress that was right in the middle of the bed. Surely I could start out with something a little less feminine, the dress very cute, as Stacy would say. I am not sure what the name of it would be, pink in color with a full skirt, although way too short in my opinion. The top seemed not big enough for me maybe that would be the way that I would be spared wearing it, if it did not fit. At least, I could hope that would be the case.

My eyes had not left the dress since I entered the bedroom, but the lingerie next to it was what I had to put on first. The bra was the first thing she handed me, not sure exactly how I should grab it, I took it from her with two fingers, the bra dangling from my fingers. Stacy laughed, then stepped in to help. My nightie is removed leaving me naked except for the panties I had to wear with the nightie. Those also were quickly gone. Stacy faced me looking me right in the eyes. As she cupped my breasts she went into teacher mode.

“These are your breasts, I do mean yours. To feel comfortable during the day they need some support. This is a bra, your bra that supports your breasts. Are you keeping up so far? You lean forward letting you breasts settle in the cups, after putting your arms through the straps. Then taking the two ends of the band to the back you hook them together. You straighten up, adjust the bra comfortably, lifting and settling your breasts in the cups to be sure they are not pinched.”

I indeed have a small bosom, probably as a result of my fouled up hormones. I would later learn that I had an A cup, filling the cups of the bra she has fastened around me adequately. It felt funny with the band around my chest, but also comforting in a way. The panties were next, the chills that went through my body as the panties slid up my legs were not asked for, but somehow enlightening. I would indeed be wearing things like this for the rest of my life. The dress followed, I stepped into it, put my arms in the sleeves and allowed Stacy to zip the dress up. As it tightened around my chest, I looked in the mirror. The hope that the dress would not fit me to keep from wearing it vanished, it fit perfectly reinforcing the feminine looks. Gone was the masculine image that I had known for twenty-five years, in its place an attractive female now occupied that image.

I had not noticed the heels on the side of the bed, too concerned about the dress and lingerie. They looked intimidating, not much to them except for the five inch heel height. I looked at Stacy, pleading with my eyes for something different and less feminine. No luck, she was enjoying this too much to give in now. She rolled stockings up my legs, the bands at the top holding them there on my thighs. Then the heels were slipped on my feet and the straps buckled securely. She reached for my hand to help me up, the sudden change in altitude almost toppling me over. When I stabilized a little she let go and walked away. She turned and held out her arms waiting for me to walk into their loving embrace. I did, the first steps in heels really not that bad.

We hung around the apartment all day, did a little laundry and made a list for the grocery store. After we scrambled some eggs for dinner I was dragged out to her car and I made my first venture as a female into the grocery store. Surprisingly it was no big deal, no one made any comments and I paid with my debit card. I talked with the cashier and the bag boy, they reacted to me as if I was a woman out shopping for groceries.

Then the next day Stacy made me tackle the elephant in the room, my job. Again dressed in a too brief dress, my hair piled on top of my head with a few ribbons to make it more feminine. Lipstick and mascara with some blusher on my cheeks we headed to my work place. She made me do everything myself, but was right behind me for moral support. My old boss took one look at me and sent me to personnel, something I was expecting. I had to wait a few minutes before I could see the head of personnel, all the possible scenarios running through my brain.

Mandy came out to get us, and we went into her office. I was offered a seat on a love seat in a casual setting, Stacy sitting right next to me and Mandy in a side chair directly opposite. She wanted me to tell her everything about my medical condition and what my prognosis was now that treatment had been concluded. I showed her copies of all my medical records, she looked them over and then handed them back to me. She went and pulled my personnel file and looked at it, where I had been assigned before and what jobs I had experienced.

She made a couple of phone calls to department heads, finally inviting one of them to her office. “I have a position in mind for you, but since you have no experience in this field, I want to assign you there for a few days to see how you adapt and fit in. We may have to try yet another possible job, but rest assured you will still be working for us, unless you willingly quit. Now I need a new name for you, Lance is so inadequate.

I hesitated but Stacy spoke first. Lets use Linda, a feminine name for a feminine lady. I nodded my head, as Mandy changed my file.

I was sent with the department head down to where I will be working, given a badge and told of what hours I will work and the dress code for this part of the company. I was not informed though of what I would be doing. I guess the fact that I would still have a job kind of overshadowed everything else. I then returned to personnel to pick up Stacy and we headed home after hugs were exchanged all around.

I actually pinched myself, to see if I was dreaming. Although I was extremely grateful, what happened today was never considered as a possibility earlier when we entered Mandy’s office. It was like I was a treasured employee, deserving of better than average treatment. Certainly before today I never had that feeling working here.

Another day and I was up early getting ready for work. Stacy was there to supervise but made me do everything myself. She dropped me off at work, telling me she will pick me up at five. I did have a purse, a few dollars for lunch in my new feminine wallet, but no keys and not enough money for a cab fare home. I was shown my new job, very similar to what I had been doing before but a couple of notches up the chain of employment. By lunch I was comfortable doing the tasks, not noticing how fast the morning went. A couple of the female employees in this department invited me to lunch, nothing fancy just some salads at the diner down the street.

It turns out that most of the employees knew of my medical situation, and had no trouble with me working as a female. Two or three sentences about my medical situation and all the rest of the time was spent on my looks and the clothing I wore for today. Both of the ladies wanted the name of the salon I used, promising to make appointments as soon as possible. The fact that I looked more like a female than they did required some correction on their part.

I ended up staying in that department, now six months later I am the department head. The six females working under my direction are all friends; lunch, a night out every once in a while and random shopping trips are common for us in a typical month.

Stacy and I ended up moving in together, according to her I needed someone to keep an eye on me and she appointed herself to be the one. I think it was more her insatiable desire to cuddle, kiss and ravish me all the time, but whatever the reason I was thrilled to be a part of it.

A year later after I was pronounced cancer free on my annual checkup, we slipped off to Vegas and got hitched. She has progressed in her job beyond all expectations now making twice what I earn. I have been told I have to find us a house, something cozy and romantic. That I am eagerly looking forward to.

Life has not been kind to me, but thanks to Stacy I have made adjustments, the life I have now full of love and hope. I have indeed lived with what Life has dealt me. No longer a male, life as a female now.

© 2016 thru 2024 by Francesca

Drew: Mom’s Love

 Drew: Mom’s Love

I closed and locked the door, picked up my suitcase and headed to the waiting cab. I turned once more in the drive and looked back at the house. My parent’s house, where I had been raised along with my older sister. After my parent's death in an accident several weeks ago, my sister and I had decided that I would stay with her for a while, as soon as my school let out for the summer.

I was a freshman in college, no major yet, our parent’s death really upsetting me. Dad was a salesman, so I only saw him on the weekends, Mom, however, I dealt with every day. I lived at home, the college only a thirty-minute drive from the house. When not in school I tried to help her all I could around the house. I guess an adequate description of me would be a Momma’s boy. I respected her, knowing what she had put up with over the years for her children.

Dad was alright I guess, but tended to make life difficult for Mom when things didn’t go well for him in sales. I don’t think he ever hit her, but the arguments were loud and often, Dad blaming all his troubles on her. That is one reason Sis moved out early; she tried to get our Mom to leave him; since she had also seen how Dad’s actions hurt our Mom. But Mom couldn’t do it, her home and kids too important to her.

Sis and I had frequent talks about it, but Mom was determined to keep us as a family, so she put up with it. So to compensate a little I spent as much time with her as possible trying to make her life a little simpler. When Sis came back for the funeral, as soon as I saw her I came to pieces. Without Mom, I didn’t know what to do. I cried for days, the funeral was simple, both of my parents wanting nothing elaborate or expensive. After returning from the funeral Sis put me to bed, and I instantly fell asleep.

When I did wake up it was late the next day, I went to the bathroom, then went to find Sis. She is in the kitchen talking on her cell phone with someone. I got a glass of orange juice from the refrigerator and sat down opposite her. From her end of the conversation, I presumed it is a lawyer, we found out that the driver of the other car was drunk, so our insurance company suggested that we also file a suit for damages and wrongful death. She finally hung up and came and hugged me. The tears started again; I have never cried so much in my life.

She just held me, hugging me and kissing my face, making soothing noises. Just exactly what my Mother used to do when I am stressed or disturbed about something. I finally got it all out; Sis returned to her chair, and we talked for quite some time. She wanted me to finish out the semester, four weeks to go, then come and live with her for a while. I agreed, not wanting to stay in the house any longer than necessary. In fact, she called one of the only friends I had and talked to his mother. Greg’s mother offered to let me stay with my friend until the semester is out.

Greg and I were neighbors; only a block separated the houses we were raised in. Friends since grade school we often played together when young, then during school, we often had the same classes. He never liked school, so when he graduated from high school, that was the extent of his education. He had got a job as a mechanic, something he had played around with since his classes in auto mechanics. We were still friends, now just with different interests.

While I never found a girl that was special to me he found one in his freshman year of high school, and they have been a couple ever since. In fact, they were planning on getting married this summer if all went as planned. Sis had to get back to her business out west, so I gathered a few items and went over to Greg’s house. His Mom welcomed me and showed me the guest room where I would be staying. We talked for a while, and she told me that she would help in any way she could.

I resumed school, having taken several days off because of my parent’s death and funeral. I performed the tasks needed but in reality, my mind is not with the program. After a week at Greg’s, I returned home, with his girlfriend around, there is not much between us anymore. The first night back home is hard; everywhere I looked memories of my Mom flooded my mind.

Luckily there were several projects at school that required my undivided attention, so I made it through the next couple of weeks without much distress. When I did have moments with nothing to do, I cleaned house, much like my mother did when things worried her. I gave away all of Dad’s clothes to charity, not wanting any reminders of him left around. For some reason, I kept all of my Mother’s clothes, not sure why, but the thought of giving them away just too hard to accept.

School ended, and I closed the house up, both Sis and I thought we would keep the house, but the memories were still too fresh to deal with at the moment. I got into the cab and headed into town. We lived a mile and a half out of town, on a small acreage with very few neighbors. Greg’s house and three others all within a block or two from our house, the only other ones in the area. Sis wanted me to fly out to stay with her, but I always feared flying, so I decided to take the bus out. It would be a two and a half day trip, but I needed the time to think what I am going to do with my life.

I wasn’t sure college was the path I wanted anymore, since my mother’s death I am not sure what I wanted with my life. I boarded the bus for the long trip, found a seat and quickly fell asleep. When I woke, we were a couple of hundred miles from home, the farthest I ever been in my life. I watched the scenery pass by the window, letting my mind wander along with the changing landscape.

Two bus changes later, I am on the final leg of my journey. Sis owns an employment agency in a medium sized town in northern Arizona. She bought the business after she had worked for them for a year. Sis was always the level headed one of the family, saving her money for the important things in life. When the agency she worked for got into trouble financially, she was there to offer them a deal. They handled the financing themselves, and within five months she had paid off the loan to them. She ran the agency herself for six months, saving in wages and making a lot of friends in the interim. Most of the people she placed were quite happy with their new job, and word of mouth quickly spread. The companies she had placed people with were also happy, getting qualified applicants for their positions.

The bus pulled into Flagstaff, a booming town on the high plains of Arizona. Sis is waiting as I step down from the bus. I walked over to the baggage area under the bus and waited for my suitcase. After getting everybody else’s luggage to them, I ask what happened to mine. He asked for my ticket and then walked into his office to call the station where I had changed buses the last time. They looked around and said it was on their dock; they would put it on the next bus; I should have it tomorrow.

I wasn’t happy; this is no way to start a new life away from my Mom. Sis led me to her car, and we drove the ten miles to her agency. We went in, and since she had an applicant waiting for her, she led me into the adjoining office while she waited on them. I looked out of the window; the San Francisco Peaks silhouetted in the background. Flagstaff is a long and skinny town, built along the old Route 66 highway. That has since turned into Interstate 40, with Interstate 17 from Phoenix, meeting on the outskirts of town. A lot of service companies reside in the town, the only major town in Northern Arizona.

The winter brings the skiers to town, the peaks offering great skiing for the residents of Phoenix and Tucson. The rest of the year you have the Grand Canyon a few miles to the North, and of course the hunting season for deer in the fall on the north rim.

Since Sis has the only employment agency in town, she gets a lot of business. Her reputation with both applicants and hiring companies has made her business really take off. Just this last month she has purchased a home south of Flagstaff, ten acres with a two story house, a bank repossession that had been abused by the previous owners. She had a lot of work done on it, but the little she paid for it made it a real steal.

She locked up the agency and decided we needed to eat out tonight. She knew of a little out of the way restaurant to the south of town, actually on her way home and we stopped there. I was introduced since she seemed to be a regular there. Everybody knew her, calling her by name. She told me what was good, and I ordered. The food is delicious and way more than I could eat. Sis kidded me; you don’t eat enough to keep a bird alive, much less a young brother.

She told me she planned for me just to lay around the house for a few days; then she had a couple of side trips planned so that I could see the sights. Maybe Las Vegas, the Grand Canyon, the Painted Desert, and Oak Creek Canyon just to name a few. I told her that sounded great; we got some carryout trays and headed home. Her house is impressive, the lights in the front lighting up both floors quite a sight. Decks both front and back, and the whole place surrounded by Pines and Junipers. Very mountain cabin like, but the house far exceeded the size of many cabins.

We made our way in, me carrying the bag that I had carried on the bus with me. In actuality one of Mom’s old shoulder bags, although not as feminine as some modern day purses. She showed me around, then made us some hot chocolate, and we set in the living room talking way into the night. She wanted me to relax, walk around the acreage, watch TV, anything to relax and try to forget why you are out here. We both loved Mom, you a lot more than me, but she is gone, probably to a happier place than here, since she doesn’t have Dad yelling at her anymore, so concentrate on you for a change. Get connected with the inner you and try to be happy for a while.

Mom and I have talked a lot about you; she knew you were hanging around to make her feel better and make her life easier. She appreciated it but felt you were denying a big part of yourself in doing so. So no more of that, this time, is for you, whatever is inside needs to be let out.

Since I didn’t have any clothes, Sis loaned me a sleep shirt of hers to sleep in. Not really girly the only clue that it was not intended for a male is the cute Teddy Bear on the front. Sis had to be up early; she had three appointments before nine A.M. I made my way downstairs a little after ten, made some toast then set on the front deck staring at the landscape. Two hours had passed before I knew it, my tummy growling a little the only clue I had that the time had elapsed. One piece of toast does not do much to nourish the body.

I made a sandwich then set in the kitchen and called the bus station about my missing luggage. Luckily I got the same guy, he remembered my luggage but told me it had not arrived yet. He would call the station again and call me back. An hour later he called back, suggesting that I turn in a claim for the items in the suitcase since it is obviously lost now. I asked him what I needed to do; he asked me what was in the suitcase, and I told him what I had packed. He filled out the claim form over the phone and sent it in. A check for the items would be issued, and I should have it within a week. He apologized for the problem and thanked me for my patience.

With no clothes to wear, what am I going to do? I scanned Sis’s closet, looking for anything that didn’t scream female. Not much there, she is definitely a girly-girl, dresses, skirts and blouses, most with bright, feminine colors and lace. I closed my eyes about to choose something to wear. I blushed when I saw what I pulled out, a dark blue mini skirt, with a chain belt. I pulled a light blue t-shirt to go with it and laid them on the bed. I picked out some panties, slipped them on and then put the skirt and t-shirt on. I looked good; the skirt accented my longer than normal legs, and the shirt gave the hint of something on top, although I was fairly flat. Now with some clothes on I looked for something to do. Like our Mom, I decided to start cleaning. Sis was okay as a housekeeper, but there were spots she obviously forgot about when she cleaned. Well forgot about or ignored. One is the upstairs bathroom, three hours later I had it spotless and appropriately sanitized.

Continuing through the day, I made my way through the house, making sure all was neat and clean. I did fix myself another sandwich for a snack, eating more than I usually do. I checked the contents of the refrigerator for ingredients to fix for dinner, finding some mashed potatoes, some gravy, a few pieces of meat. I decided to make Shepherd’s pie, something Mom often made to stretch the food budget. I opened a can of green beans and peas to use in the mix, layered it in the dish with the meat and potatoes, then placed it in the oven to bake.

Sis is on time, arriving a little after five. She took one look at me and then giggled. “You do look nice; maybe those clothes should be utilized instead of buying you new ones. I take it your luggage is lost since you have raided my closet.” I looked down at my feet, but she would have none of that. She raised my chin making me look into her eyes. I love my sibling, no matter what clothes are worn by him/her. Personally, I think that the outfit is adorable, much nicer than you have worn in the past.

I told her to change; dinner is ready. I got the look, but she skipped off to change anyway. A few moments later she entered the kitchen, dressed more casual and sat down at the table. “I see you have been busy, the house has never looked better; I now understand why Mom liked your help around the house. Just remember you are not out here to clean my house, you are to take some time for yourself, to figure out what you want to do.”

She took a bite of the shepherd’s Pie and let out a low moan. “I could get used to this, a clean house and the best food I have had since I left Mom. I see you have been taught well, can you cook other things also?” I nodded my head yes, and we were quiet as she annihilated a good portion of the pie. I had hoped to make two meals maybe out of the pie, but now that was not possible. I ate a little more than usual for me; I enjoyed being around Sis, not realizing till now how much I missed her.

I did the dishes quickly, then got out the pan of brownies I had mixed up. When Sis saw them, she groaned but made a beeline for the pan. Another moan as she took her first bite, then she hauled off and hit me on the shoulder. I asked what that was for; she giggled you are going to make me fat at this rate. “I am going to have to join the gym to keep my shape.”

I had made some iced tea, and we each took a glass of it into the living room, of course, Sis had another square of the brownies in her other hand. We set on the love seat overlooking the front deck, a beautiful panorama of the setting sun through the trees in front of us. We talked for a while, she asked if I know how to do anything but clean? She is giggling as the last of that left her mouth. I told her I was fairly good on the computer, was literate in Office and Word. She asked if I could type, I told her yes, but only about forty words a minute.

I asked her how her business is going; she is proud of it, but she knows in this town it will never be a stable thing. Once you fill the open jobs, there are very few new ones popping up, the town growing, but never to the degree of Phoenix or Tucson. It will always be a tourist town, and a ski resort town in the winter. A one person operation except for a few letters of reference or resumes typed up on occasion.

She has had another idea in her mind for quite some time; maybe she will look into it more in the near future. Since I had the house cleaned what am I planning to do for the next few days? I didn’t know, really hadn’t thought about it. She asked if I was ready to buy some male clothes since mine were no longer. I hesitated, she smiled, you can wear some of mine, you look better in them than I do. I tried to protest some, but she hushed me. Mom has mentioned to me that you often wore some of hers, a fact that I am sure you didn’t think Mom knew about.

She asked if I kept Mom’s clothes, my face turning red an answer I am sure she already knew. She told me to call Mildred, Greg’s Mom and tell her to pack all of them up and she will arrange for a trucking company to pick them up. I made an attempt to tell her, no, but I really wanted her clothes, so I just turned a brighter red and never made eye contact with her. Sis told me since we were all about the same size we could share the clothes. She told me to tell her no underwear; it is not good to share underwear among other females, so that could be thrown away. I will send her a check for her trouble and then ask her for the spare key back.

I know you are still in love with the house, but I think too many sad memories still exist for either of us to eventually go back there. I think we ought to sell it, take the money and start a future for you out here. Think about it; no decision has to be made now, maybe in a few weeks.

The next day I made the call, Mildred glad to do the deed, I told her if there were some things that she particularly liked for her to take them. I told her the underwear gets trashed, and that we are going to try and sell the house. She told me that her sister is looking in the area for a house and if I didn’t mind she would show her the house later today. I told that is fine if she is interested for her to call my sister and gave her the number to the agency.

I called the trucking lines that Sis had given me the names of and asked for the rates to ship the boxes out here. I made a guess about the number of the boxes, but I am sure I came fairly close to the actual number. I arranged for one to pick up the boxes the first of next week, they would be in transit for five days, so we should have them Friday or Saturday. The one I ended up selecting had the best rates and offered the fastest turnaround of the companies I called.

With that handled I decided to do some exploring of the property, maybe do a little day dreaming if I could find the right spot. The land dropped off from the little plateau that the cabin was built on, the woods pretty thick back there. I found a small twisting trail that led into a clearing that had a small pond setting in the middle of it. The stream that fed it was small, winding down from the other side of the small canyon, then into the small pond. From the edge of the pond, the stream reemerged and wandered further down the canyon.

I called it a stream, in reality, it is only three to four feet wide, maybe only running during the rainy season. There are several trees growing along the edge of the pond, making the scene peaceful and beautiful. I found a rock outcropping near the entrance of the stream, parked myself and scanned the scenery. This is all hidden from the cabin, although only three hundred feet from the back door. I set there for several hours watching the birds and squirrels playing at the water’s edge.

Reluctantly I headed back to the cabin, figuring that it is time to start dinner. I had seen some frozen hamburger patties in the freezer, envisioning a tall juicy hamburger tonight along with some French Fries. Sis had some bakery rolls, so I cut them and buttered them, planning to toast them later in the oven. I cooked the patties in a skillet, while I cut up the onion, tomato, and lettuce to place on them. I found some Swiss cheese in the refrigerator, along with all the accouterments necessary to make the burger taste good. The oil for the French fries was hot, and I lowered the fries into it. I turned on the broiler to toast the buns and as the fries finished Sis made it through the door.

She sniffed the air, embraced me, telling me the smell is heavenly. I told her to change; dinner is ready, but apparently, the smell is too overpowering, so she just sat down and started digging in. She told me that she got a call this afternoon, from Mildred’s sister and they loved the house. They made us an offer on the house, but you know what sealed the deal is how clean the house was. She and Mildred walked the entire house and found not a speck of dirt or dust anywhere in the house. Anyway, the offer is quite generous, and I have accepted it. My lawyer here is drawing up the papers, and we complete the deal at the end of next week.

I know you are reluctant to sell the house, it is Mom’s prized possession, but Mom is gone, and she wants both of us to be happy, especially you. When her stuff gets here there is something in her jewelry box she wanted you to have, I think it will convince you how much she loved you, your caring and attention appreciated so much by her.

I cleaned up after dinner, washed the dishes, then Sis, and I set down on the rear deck. I told her of the little pond, behind the house, the squirrels and the birds playing there all afternoon. She had never walked back there, too busy and too lazy to check into things. Now that I am here maybe we can find some time to enjoy things more.

She had brought home a large file from her office of correspondence, letters of reference, and job specification sheets from the employers. She also had brought a new computer home; she wanted me to set it up in the room she used for an office and retype all of the letters and correspondence in the file. If all goes well, she wants to start a secretarial service here in town. I could work from home, emailing or faxing the processed documents to them. She thinks there is enough small businesses in town that need the service every once in a while, to make it profitable.

After I try it, she will run an ad in the local paper to drum up some business, if I am interested. It sounded good, something to occupy my time, but also maybe earning me a few dollars. It took me most of the evening to set up the new computer including internet access and some virus protection. I typed the first letter, making a mistake or two, but it looked good after they were corrected and printed on the printer she had purchased to go with the computer.

I kind of lost track of time as I typed away, my sister finally coming to get me to go to bed. It was fifteen minutes after midnight, and I had been busy at it for over three hours. As I was getting into some pajamas, Sis was looking at the items that I had typed up. She saw where I had typed up all the items but two, those last two fairly lengthy. When I returned ready for bed, she asked if I liked the work. I told her it was easy to get involved, much like cleaning a house. You started and soon time has sped by. I told her I thought it would work if she could drum up some business.

We went to bed after she made sure that I could deal with selling Mom’s house. I liked it out here much better, so even though I still had some attachment to it, it would be for the better. I laid in bed for a while just staring out the window at the shadows of the landscape. The moon is up, and the pine needled shadows of a few branches were casting themselves on the bedroom wall. It indeed is a more peaceful place, a connection to something more significant than lost memories.

The next morning I had made some toast and sausage patties for her, and of course coffee. She asked me to set up email accounts for my work, one for the public and one for her to use to contact me at home. Then if I was ambitious, maybe a simple website listing what things I would be able to do for customers. She would do some research on what I could charge for performing the services, and we could decide tonight on the prices I would charge.

I again raided my sister’s closet for something to wear, even though the male clothes I wore here had been cleaned and hanging in my closet. I selected an outfit, trying to pick something that would look coordinated, but comfy to wear. It ended up being a pair of pants, almost bell bottoms, and a tank top, both in muted shades of peach. I found a scarf that had peach colors in it but was quite colorful and bright with bold colors. That tied around my neck made the outfit perfect. I even tried some of her lipstick; it did require me several applications before I got it looking right. I used to be good at coloring when I was a kid but now the simple task of staying within the lines of my lips seemed difficult.

The day progressed quickly; email accounts the easiest to obtain. I used Gmail accounts; widely used and easy to set-up. The website was a little more difficult since I had never done one. I got the domain name from one of the major providers, purchased it and followed their instructions on how to put it together. It wouldn’t be active until later tonight, but I had the basics together. Tonight the only thing I could find for dinner was some frozen everything in one bag, one skillet meals. Mom on occasion had used some of these, her secret to making it taste like something is the spices. She had taught me well, sampling it as I added the different spices until it tasted decent.

Tomorrow would require a trip to the grocery store; there was just not anything left to make any meals out of. Her spices were limited and most out of date. I threw out three bottles full as I had prepared tonight’s dish, the spice obviously spoiled. Sis was impressed, she ate more than half of it herself, promising me that we would join the gym on Saturday, her to keep trim and me as a punishment for being too good a cook.

The next morning I was getting ready to go with Sis to work so that I could borrow the car to grocery shop. I had on some of my male clothes, but just the few days that I had been wearing my sister’s things I got spoiled. I yanked my male things off and put on what I had picked last night from her closet. Some lipstick and I was ready. I never thought of me being a male that I should not be dressing in her clothes. They fit me, were comfortable and I looked good in them so I continued to wear her clothing.

We drove to her work and went in. There had been several people outside waiting to see her, so as she was handling her first customer, I tried to help the others. Both had never been to the agency, so I had then fill out the proper forms. Sis kept a list of available jobs on the office computers, so I looked through them trying to match the applicant’s qualifications with the available employment. I had gotten them each a soft drink when they came in and had them waiting for when she was through.

When her first customer left, I took the completed form into her office, along with the job most likely to fit their qualifications. I could see Sis staring at me, but before she could say anything I showed the applicant into her office. Another forty minutes Sis was through with that one, and I did the same with the last applicant. This one had two job listings that she qualified for, so I laid the appropriate paperwork down on her desk. I told her that I had called both of those employers to make sure the positions are still open. I got a big smile, then I closed her office door and went back to cleaning the office.

The applicant apparently got one of the jobs, leaving the office all excited and a huge smile on her face. Sis came out and hugged me, where have you been all my life. Tomorrow we are moving your computer here, and you are now my secretary, no make that my PA. I giggled a little but knew deep down that I now had fit in with something, no longer an outcast, and a misfit. Maybe this will all work out, after all.

The rest of the day is similar to this morning, several applicants appearing, even a couple of college students needing a part time job. I searched her job listings, matching up prospective jobs with the applicant. One of the applicants had no job listing matches, so I called a couple of the firms that had listed other jobs, telling them I had an applicant with her qualifications. One had no openings, but liked her qualifications. The other wanted to talk to her, an employee that was leaving later in the month, needed to be replaced. When I told Sis of what I had done I got an eager hug, then a cheek kiss. The applicant was behind me so she couldn’t show me any more signs of her appreciation.

At the end of the day she had placed five of the six applicants, even getting one of the college students a part-time job. I had called a bunch of places, and several of them had not got back with me, they were appreciative that I had called and told them of my applicants and their qualifications. They would let me know if there was any vacancies. I set up a separate file listing the student and their experience, so that when I got a call I could match one of them up.

That night I ordered some pizza to be delivered, a place that one of the applicants had told me about. They had worked there briefly, said the pizza was excellent, which ones were the best and what not to order. After Sis and I had annihilated the pizza I would have to agree with them, the empty box a sure sign of a delicious pizza. I mean not even a crumb was left in the box.

I managed to take the computer down, the one that I had just set up the night before. I loaded it in her car ready to take it to the office tomorrow and reassemble it. We decided I would only work until three, do my grocery shopping, then swing back by the office to pick her up. We had several more applicants from the local college, word spreading about her getting one of them a part time job. Apparently jobs in this town for a student were very scarce. I made a lot more cold calls that afternoon advertising that we had many experienced students needing employment and that we could match their needs to the proper applicant.

I managed to find three more students jobs, a fact for which Sis is very grateful for. The fees she got even for a part-time job would help pay the bills. The employers were happy because they didn’t have to interview or worry if the applicant they chose could perform the work.

For the day I had dressed again in my sister’s clothes. They felt right and I liked how I looked in them. Today was a light rose shirtwaist dress, some stockings and a pair of her heels. Of course some light makeup, my hair in a ponytail. The grocery shopping went quicker than I had intended, so I managed to get the food home and put away. I put a roast on to bake, added potatoes and onions, plus some fresh celery stems. Although the celery would cook down to nothing, the flavor it added more than worth the addition of it.

When I got back the office was full, my sister very glad to see me. I took each applicant, had then fill out the proper forms, matched jobs to their qualifications and then handed them over to Sis. I found three more college students part-time jobs on my own, Sis too busy helping ones to find full time jobs. It turned out to be almost six-thirty before we were able to head home. The roast was done, so I served it up and Sis almost finished it off by herself. After she was done she hit me on the arm, I looked at her, “Why did you hit me again?”

“Cause you are going to make me fat, we are stopping at the gym tomorrow at lunch, if I don’t you might be the only one that can fit into my clothes.” True to her word we did stop and both of us joined the gym. I had not thought it through very well, my dress that day very feminine, plus the lipstick that I wore, the gal at the gym presumed me to be female. I had not checked the gender box, but as she was looking over my application she did it for me. The realization hit me when we headed to the car, I was signed up as a female, now only able to use the female side of the gym.

Sis had watched the proceedings, never saying a word to me, as we left she told me that what happened was the best option. I will look into getting you a gender change, you might just as well be female and be happy, then suffer as a male. I turned and looked at her, fear in my face. “You can get somebody to cut it off, what if I want to keep it.”

“Let’s face it even if you could keep it, I doubt it would ever be used. I have never seen anyone more attuned to the female gender then you. Let’s take the next step, a set of breasts might be nice, helping to fill out your dresses and blouses better. After Mom’s clothes get here, we need to see what might be appropriate for you to wear, then shop to fill in your wardrobe. I can’t have a dumpy looking PA in my employ, can I?”

Two days later the boxes of clothes showed up, I tried them all on and made my selections of what looked best on me. I made sure they were all washed and hung them in my closet. Mom’s jewelry box was included in the boxes, something I forgot about but Sis remembered and had Mildred pack it among the clothes. I opened the drawers carefully, her jewelry was her prized possession. In one of the drawers was her diamond earrings, a gift from her Mother. Along with the earrings was a note, addressed to me.

Drew

For all of the things you have done for me over the years, take these earrings as a gift from me. Wear them proudly and often, thinking of me as you do so. I know you had your ears pierced in high school, so they will look gorgeous on you. A gift from a Mother to her youngest daughter, who have made my last few years so enjoyable.

Love Mom

After I quit crying I put on the earrings, looking in the mirror at my reflection. A huge smile lit up my face, then I finished going through her clothes. My one set of male clothes found their way to the trash can, I was sure I would never need or desire them again. I ended up keeping all but three of Mom’s dresses and all but two of her skirts.

Sis’s business continued to improve, even a few people from the surrounding towns were using her services. When we got the first ones from out of town I made calls to the companies in those towns offering our services and finding out if they needed immediate help. References were given so that they could check us out, to see that we only supplied well qualified applicants for any job. It was only a few days later when we placed our first applicants in those towns, now Sis was supplying employment help along I-40, eighty miles in each direction.

My job became routine, even a few of the locals recognizing me on the street and saying hi. Her business continued to grow both in placing employees in jobs and as a secretarial service. During most days I was constantly busy, either trying to place employees or typing up something for someone.

Sis and I did get out and do some shopping, her P.A, never looking better in her new ensembles. Sis usually closed the business around Christmas for a couple of weeks, a time to squeeze in a vacation or take a trip somewhere. This time it was used for her P.A. to get a set of breasts. The salon did the work, six hours of a pump sucking the breasts from my chest. I was so proud of them walking around with my chest pushed out as far as I could manage. Sis seeing me and breaking out in uncontrollable giggles. I did join her, I was acting like a child proud of her new toys. The thing was I was proud of them, the last missing part of the puzzle. I thought back to Mom, she would be thrilled to see me happy, such a simple thing as getting breasts making me complete. Since sis used some of the money from selling the house, it was truly a treasured gift showing Mom’s love for me. .

© 2016 thru 2024 by Francesca

Maggie; A Little More Cleavage

 Maggie; A Little More Cleavage

It was a mid afternoon appointment, two-thirty for a body waxing and the addition of breasts. Mary, the stylist at Turnabout Gurl Salon had everything set up for me. All I had to do is show-up and the deed would be done. Since Mary is a friend of Melody’s, I had been squeezed in, a dinner date for me with my wife at our favorite restaurant the reason for the appointment. One that I couldn’t miss, I needed to apologize and try to reason with Melody for a stupid statement made without using any part of my limited intellect. The fact that the statement should have never seen the light of day seemed irrelevant now, the irrational statement voiced and her reaction to it implemented.

With the first rip of the cloth I was in agony, the warm wax felt good, but when the cloth had been pushed into it and then ripped off I was ready to leave the table I was on. “OMG what are you doing to me.” Her no words answer, is a towel pushed into my mouth to quiet my protests.

The waxing hurt, every last hair ripped from its follicle quickly, but not necessarily painlessly. The cloth strips were pushed into the hot wax, then jerked off in rapid succession. I never got a chance to even get a breath before the next cloth was ripped away. The cream rubbed into the skin after the process is completed, helped, but did not alleviate the tingles and pain the process created. After a few moments I did get a chance to rub the smooth creamy skin, the feelings that radiated through my body made me pause and wonder what it would be like to have smooth hair free skin all the time.

“That feels so good, you can keep doing that to me all day if you want. The cream that is, not the waxing.”

“Yeah, I could but if you want breasts before tonight I need to get started.” Quipped Mary.

I really didn’t want breasts, the stupid remark again and Melody’s reply the reason I am getting waxed and a pair of breasts added to my chest. I am relatively happy with my life as a male, up until my remark Melody and I got along pretty good. There have been arguments, but we always managed to solve them to our mutual satisfaction, until now. This time I think I have pushed her too hard, the reaction from Melody not what I had expected to say the least.

We have been married for three years now, again mainly due to the persistence of Melody, I had dated her in college, but never followed through. Back then I was basically unsure of myself in everything I did, whether it was a decision on something pertaining to college or something simple like asking her for another date. When in doubt, do nothing had been my motto, so any romancing between us was all due to Melody. Melody did step up to the plate, thankfully, inviting me out to dinner or a show. I was aware I should be doing these things myself, but in real life those actions never materialized. After many quite pleasant dates she cornered me in the restaurant that we ate at one night, wanting to know when I was going to develop a backbone and ask her to marry me. Just like before I stumbled, words were muttered but none of them made any sense.

She got pissed, pulled a ladies engagement ring out of her purse and slid in on my finger. I stared at the ring and swallowed hard. With some giggling she whispered in my ear to say yes. I did get out the word, now she was outright laughing at my facial expression. She did comment that if I kept this up, I might be the one walking down the aisle in the wedding dress, in fact you would probably look prettier in it than me. I tried to remove the ring, some sanity returning to my poor overworked mind, hoping to get the ring off and slide it on to her finger. I did get down on one knee asking her to marry me, she replied yes and then kissed me. Unfortunately the ring would not come off, so she paid the check, dragged me to the car and made sure I was handled as you would handle a prospective bride on the ride to her apartment. A few hours later, wonderful sexy hours, I managed a retreat to my own home. When I did eventually get home, my nipples were sore, I had lipstick all over my face from her kissing and junior was totally pooped. It was a night to remember, that is for sure. Her engagement ring was still on my finger, refusing to budge from it.

Even though I was basically unsure of myself in my dealings with life, I did manage a decent grade point average during college, graduated and was soon working for a company in town. Not upper level management, but also not an hourly worker. I was proud of the fact I was male, just four inches under six feet tall and fairly skinny, weighing a little over a hundred and forty pounds.

While Melody had only her Mother as family, I still had both Mom and Dad. Melody and her Mother were close, while I saw very little of my family, Dad being the main reason for a standoffish relationship. He had been disappointed in me, I was not the athlete he desired me to be. His son Barry, that's me, not following in his footsteps forever causing a breech in our relationship. I saw Mom often, but Dad was always busy or had to go somewhere when I arrived. Maybe that lack of something between us caused some of my unsure behavior, a guess on my part, but nothing more.

Back to the present the requirement that I have breasts, however, is a different matter completely. The machine for sucking a pair of breasts out of the body is intimidating, a cup or form, way too large in my opinion, hooked to hoses hanging from the overhead arm positioned above my body ready for their victim. All of this attached to a vacuum pump intent on making mountains out of molehills. According to Mary I had to state that I wanted the procedure, plus sign a release, a must for the salon to avoid problems later. I didn’t think about it that much, I just wanted the relationship between Melody and myself back to where it was a couple of days ago. That desire clouded my thoughts, what I ended up with much more than I bargained for. Mary had offered several choices, but my mind was not on what she said, just give me some breasts so that I can get back into Melody’s good graces.

When the stupid remark first left my mouth I tried to apologize, but Melody was insistent that I show her the error of her ways. The sooner I get this done the sooner that I might enjoy the benefits of her loving and caressing again.

I did sign the forms required, Mary giving me a copy for my records. The cups are lowered to my chest and a paste is applied around the edges sealing them to my chest. The pump is turned on and the tissue starts filling the cups. Mary did inject some fatty tissue into the cups before the pump started. It is a slow process taking four to five hours for the cup to fill. My eyesight is limited some, the size of the suction forms blocking some of the view of my lower extremities. I could feel them though, as my skin was pulled into the cups.

Way too many hours later the hoses were unhooked and the machine rolled away to its place in the corner. The pulsating of the pump had made me drowsy, I felt Mary working on my body during this time period but I was basically out of it. With the pump off I laid there staring at the ceiling wondering how long it would take for my new breasts to go down to a manageable size. Something that I might conceal under a baggy sweater or a sweatshirt.

After waiting for an hour, Mary reappeared with a bra and some clothes in her hands. She laid them on a counter and approached my new amendments. She touched the cups, they seem to be less rigid now than when this started. She announced the forms would stay on, dissolving over the next two to three days. They were already bouncing around, the slightest body movement causing some jiggling activity with my new appendages. In her hands she had two syringes, to stabilize the new breast tissue, and quickly injected one each into the appropriate breasts right through the nipple. I felt the syringe enter the nipple, but there was no overt pain involved.

A concern did materialize as to how I would be able to maintain a male image at work next week. Probably should have thought of that sooner, but a lot of things should have happened that didn’t including the control of my mouth. My overwhelming desire to smooth out things with Melody prevented me thinking matters through, now I was sure to face many more problems before this was over.

Mary grabbed a bra and helped me position it over my breasts, a new and unknown feeling radiating through my breasts and chest. It took me several times to fasten the thing correctly. Mary making suggestions, but otherwise leaving it up to me. The feeling of the material in the cups of the bra caressing my new tissue hard to ignore. Thankfully the bra did stop some of the jiggling activity, allowing my mind to concentrate on how in the hell did I get myself into this predicament. Even though some of the cup remained, I could feel the movement and touch of the bra. With the bra holding my new breasts securely, a blouse is handed to me.

I simple pullover design with a plunging neckline, my stupid remark getting its first lesson in what it feels like to experience a plunging neckline. The smaller cups of the bra barely holding my breasts in their confines. I feared they would fall out of their support at any moment. Looking down at my cleavage it seemed that all of my assets were on display, the gap between the two pieces of fabric of the blouse seemed to be immense. With the minimal material connecting the two cups on the bra there is nothing hiding the vast expanse between the two cups, the deep cleavage between the two orbs very noticeable, especially to me.

Mary took a couple of minutes to brush my hair till it fell around my shoulders, not in its usual ponytail. It felt good as it brushed my shoulders and settled around my face and ears. Letting my hair grow to its present shoulder length, helping in my presentation as a feminine individual. A presentation that I was not thrilled about or desired.

The light burgundy color of the blouse and the silky fabric barely covered the outline of the bra. I was indeed covered, but it seems that what I am wearing would be no secret from anyone looking at me. With the blouse settled on my body, the Docker’s pants I had worn to the salon became the piece of clothing that looked out of place.

Mary suggested the capris that she had brought me might be a better choice. The tan color looked better than the yellow Dockers, with the burgundy trim on the cuffs of the capris matching the blouse perfectly. Now the waxing seemed prudent, the hair below the capris would have been a no-no in fashion circles. To be able to wear the capris something had to be done with my male shorts. A light pink pair of panties found their way into my hand, and eventually on my body. As they settled in place on my hips I noticed how closely they fit between my legs. I closed my eyes and sighed, the feeling almost too much. I wonder how Melody handles all of these sensations affecting her body. There was no thoughts about the smooth groin that was now on display, it was kind of numb down there, maybe the waxing and cream had affected the area.

Of course, you change the pants you have to make adjustments to the footwear. The clunky athletic shoes not blending in well, their black color all the more revolting. The best Mary could do is a pair of tan heels, blending with my outfit perfectly, but not the best for walking in. The three-inch height of the heel adding to my statuesque looking body, but it also caused some stability problems. Several trips around the salon, and I could manage to walk unaided, although shorter strides and walking more in a line made it manageable not easier. I did notice I had developed a sway to my rear as I walked around, something that was not there before. It seemed easier to walk now, my thighs easily rubbing against each other. Still no connection to a difference that was not noticed at all yet by my feeble mind.

She handed me a purse that matched the heels, I refused till I found that the capris had no pockets to use. My wallet and keys deposited therein and I am ready to go. I did pay Mary for her work, and tipped her for bearing with me. I did get a smirk from her, as I was settling up, maybe my desire to please Melody was funny to her. The image in the mirror at the front of the salon showed that the male idiot that had mouthed those words got his just desserts. I just hope Melody is happy with the replacement.

Since Melody is picking me up here, I sat down in one of the love seats at the front of the salon to await her arrival. As I sat I crossed my legs at the knees, similar to what Melody does all the time. It was comfortable sitting that way. My mind kept going back to the discussion that started all of this. I have been encouraging Melody to wear a little more revealing clothing. She is a beautiful woman, confident in her appearance and her actions.

The stupid part came about when I am trying to convince her of the need for her to be more daring in her dress.

“If I had such a gorgeous pair of breasts I would always be wanting to show them off, to entice my lover to fondle them and to make other women jealous.” Sadly these were my words on that fateful day. A male who is so unsure of himself that he can’t even propose to his fiance, but yet open his mouth and stick both feet firmly inside.

“Well let’s get you a pair and you can show me how it’s done.” The biggest smile appeared on Melody’s face, as I sweated a response that wouldn’t make things worse than they were. An hour later the call is made to Mary and my appointment is made. That response never came, silence the better part of valor in this case. I didn’t expect Melody to go through with the appointment for me, I thought she was just bluffing.

My thoughts are back to now as Melody enters the salon. She takes in my appearance and attacks me. Her kisses, groping hands and a tongue that is clearing my throat make her reaction to me pleasant. Yeah, all I have to do now is get my heart back beating and refill my lungs with air. Normalcy returns somewhat, she uses a tissue to remove her lipstick from my face then hands me my lipstick so that I can fix my lips before going to dinner.

As I slide a coat of color on my lips, I had forgotten what I originally came into the salon for. Yes, I came into the salon for something else, I just can’t remember what it was. I am led to her car and seated in the passenger side. The ride to the restaurant is brief, the walk from the parking lot still a little unsteady, but Melody has her hand on my lower back to help guide me and support me. We are quickly seated, a corner booth private and dimly lit. She orders for me, a white wine and vegetarian lasagna, my usual order. She also gets a white wine, and her usual calzone with pepperoni and provolone cheese. I sit there staring at her and trying not to breathe much. Every breath causing my breasts to move up and down distracting the hell out of me.

She slips a little closer to me, ending up with her hand on my thigh. She moves it back and forth slowly. Her caresses did cover the groin area, a raising of her eyebrows when she runs her hand over my smooth front. The sensation of the silky material over my hairless skin almost too much for me.

“Please stop, I see the error of my ways, I am wrong in what I foolishly stated yesterday, please stop or I am going to make a fool out of myself right here in the restaurant.” She removes her hand, smiles and asks if I want to be screwed tonight. That statement and her hand brushing over my nipples sent me over the top and I climaxed right there in the booth. Luckily I managed to keep my mouth closed so the low moan that emerged was not able to be heard by all. She giggled and asked if I needed her help in cleaning up my little mess. I nodded my head and she pulled me out of the booth and we headed for the ladies room.

It was a sticky gooey mess, I don’t remember cumming that much before, the amount in my panties and all over my groin quite a record for me. My mind suddenly sprang into action, my penis is gone, now nothing but a slit framed by two lips. The cum still oozing out of my slit. I wavered a little, then Melody saw what was missing, her giggling was infectious but also embarrassing. She told me we had to talk once we got home, there are things that need explaining. Apparently I also need to get you some tampons to carry in your purse from now on.

With my face still a deep red it took more than several paper towels to clean up the mess. Melody did show me a couple of tricks in how to remove the stickiness, mainly warm water with the panties off then wrapped in a towel to soak up some of the moisture. When they went back on they were still wet, but at least not sticky. She gave me one of her sanitary pads to wear to soak up any more leakage, but the resulting red from the embarrassment probably more telling than the wet panties would have been.

We finished dinner in a relative normal manner, at least, she managed to keep her hands to herself. I ate a little of my entree, but it was not from a lack of hunger but nervousness. We split a decadent chocolate cake/mousse concoction that probably added five pounds to our figures. She paid the check then steered me to her car. I got myself situated in the passenger seat then she headed away from our house towards the foothills. I let out a big sigh, apparently lots more to come of this evening before we head home.

She pulled into a state park with a view of the valley we lived in. The stars were out, the evening temperature in the seventies, a very pleasant evening. She slid over next to me, laying my head on her shoulder. That felt so good, a soft place to lay and try to forget the mess that I am in. “You did show me what I have been missing being so uptight and conservative. When I first saw you at the salon I wanted to do you right there on the love seat. It took tremendous self-control for me to let that chance slide by. You made your point, about the clothing, I will try and wear more provocative clothing for you.”

“Now I think you need to tell me what you had done at the salon. I had arranged with Mary for you to be waxed and then some breast forms applied to your chest. She did tell me that she was going to kid you about making it more permanent, but we both knew that you wouldn’t go for it. What I am feeling when I hug you is not breast forms, the movement of them when you walk and breathe deeply more like real breasts. So an explanation is in order. While you are at it, you might tell me what happened to your male organ. That slit and two cute lips not very masculine dear. I am not complaining though, I am sure we can take advantage of what is now available.”

I am almost in tears, so wrapped up in making things right with Melody, I apparently missed half of the conversation today at the salon. Melody had made it simple and temporary, I had signed my male life away, at least for quite some time. I recounted what I remembered from our discussions at the salon, Melody giggling first, then outright laughter. I had done it to myself, all by myself with no help from anyone else. No one to blame or accuse of dirty tricks, just me.

“Will my stupidity cause any change in our relationship? I know you married a male, now I have larger assets then you, please say you still love me and will not throw me out for this act of stupidity.”

She was quiet for some time, rubbing my new breasts, causing me a lot of discomfort. Her other hand rubbing my new vagina through the capris. Believe me my male apparatus under the vagina needed no more stimulation. Since some of the feeling had returned I knew I still had one, just tucked away for the moment. I twisted and turned trying to keep from creaming my panties again. I cleared my throat finally getting her attention.

“I might be persuaded to put up with you, I will have to have my breasts enlarged, can’t have my hubby’s larger than mine. Then there is the problem with sharing clothes with you, you will no doubt want to wear my sexier outfits so we will have to buy more clothes. With more clothes we will have to have more lingerie, shoes, makeup, cosmetics, and accessories. Two salon appointments every week, my SO will always have to be pretty and beautiful for her spouse. There is one advantage though, now that you are female you can help with the housework, cooking and laundry.”

She leaned in close to me, taking my head in both of her hands and tilting it back a little, her lips meeting mine and her tongue slipping in between my lips. It felt like she was going to push her tongue all the way down my throat. I was breathing through my nose but still having a hard time getting sufficient air to breathe in my lungs.

I closed my eyes, the feelings saturating my mind with endorphins. She moved her lips from my lips to my ears and I did cream my panties again. She was giggling as I was beet red from embarrassment. I better take you home before the cum dries, otherwise we may never get you out of your lingerie. I set low in the seat, humiliated to the extreme, her formerly male husband with real breasts, coming twice just from external stimulation of my ears and body.

When we got home I was helped into the house, taken directly to our bedroom and stood by the side of the bed. She undressed me removing each garment and laying it on the bed. I tried to help but my hands were swatted and placed by my side. I was almost in tears, I had fouled up everything now I couldn’t even act like a male, every touch causing me to react more like a female, my male seed oozing out of my vagina all over my lingerie.

Real breasts, a vagina, lingerie, female clothes, the list goes on and on. Her former husband more of a female than his wife. At least in our loving she could control herself somewhat, not coming at the slightest provocation.

She laid me on the bed, retrieved a wet warm towel and cleaned me up both front and back. Junior was loving every minute of it, straining hard under his cover to show his enthusiasm. Unfortunately he was securely glued in place, he could get excited but swelling up to his former size was not happening, not for quite some time.

My nipples were red and raw by the time she stopped playing, I was moaning and squirming all over the bed. I pleaded with her to do something, anything to make me come. Instead she switched to the other breast and played with it for a while. I was crying pleading with her to finish me off, but instead she would kiss me on the lips, lick my face or ears and then go back to my breasts. My eyes were closed trying to ignore some of the feelings that were attacking my mind, then I felt her breath on my new female appliance. Oh gawd no, I wiggled viciously trying to escape her clutches. She looked up often, smiling as her fingers stroked my new sex. In between times she would tenderly kiss the two lips surrounding my moist slit, then blow her breath down the slit with a tongue inserted every once in a while. I heard a drawer open and close, but too much was happening and my eyes were shut hard trying to deal with all the these feelings assaulting my mind.

Then something larger than her finger was slid up and down my slit, the new sensations almost causing me to black out. I opened my eyes when I realized what she had taken out of the drawer. I raised my head to see what she was doing at the same time she pushed the dildo deep into my new vagina. I screamed in ecstasy, arched my back and fainted. When I regained consciousness I was shaking the reverberations of my orgasm still affecting me. In fact, it was at least twenty minutes later before my body stopped shaking. Melody had moved up to where she was laying on my chest, her lips on one of my nipples and my heart rate starting to climb again. I pleaded for her to stop, if she continues there is a good chance of me dying from orgasmic bliss.

This time around the clean-up was accomplished under the shower head. Of course, she helped wash me, and with my new play toys that was another lesson in frustration. I was able to get clean, into one of her nighties and in bed as she was finishing slipping on her nightie. I was worrying how I was going to get any sleep, when I succumbed to it without even knowing it. The next thing I remember is the alarm clock the next morning.

Then my head shot up, oh gawd I have got go to work and how am I going to hide these breasts of mine. I ran to the bathroom, did my morning business and stared at my feminine image in the mirror. Male hair, no makeup, but a huge pair of hooters on my chest. I doubted a large shirt would cover them up, probably just make them look that much more feminine. Yeah a pair of sizable breasts, how can they be construed as anything but feminine.

At that time Melody waltzed into the bathroom with a smile from ear to ear. “I have called your boss Donna, she can’t wait to see you with your new assets. For today, till we can get you femmed up a little more she will keep you in her office to do some special projects for her. Tomorrow though you will be back to your previous job, boobs and all. I will not allow you to hide or shirk your responsibilities, you are a female now, and can work your job dressed as one. I have made another appointment for you to finish the transformation you have started, remember this is what you started, I am just helping you get to the point that you can live and do your job as one.

At least I was spared a dress, cute panties, a pair of slacks and a blouse that buttoned up the back was the fare instead. That was slid on me after the bra was fastened around my chest, cradling my new breasts. Some lipstick, hair in a ponytail and I was delivered to work. I presume Melody did not trust me to make the trip myself. She even went in with me, to see Donna. As I stood before her desk, she raised her eyes to take in my appearance, then a huge smile spread across her face. Do we have a name yet, something feminine that suits your new appearance?

I suddenly lost my voice, not even having a thought on that subject. Melody spoke up for me suggesting Maggie as my new moniker. Well the two of them voted, Maggie won hands down and I was led over to another desk in her office and given a project to do. I received a kiss from Melody, with her telling me that she would be back at three to pick me up, my salon appointment was for three-thirty. I tried to voice an opinion, wanting to not take this any further, but when I tried to speak there were no words forthcoming.

I started on the project that Donna had assigned me, it was mainly busy work, but the way I was dressed I was appreciative for the work out of the public eye. I wondered how I would hold up tomorrow, back at my regular job and dressed totally as a female. For some reason I could see myself in a dress tomorrow and probably heels, full makeup and some sort of curly hairstyle. I wonder if that was what I thought would happen or something I hoped would happen. I could smell my brain overworking, probably emitting puffs of smoke as it tried to explore all of the possibilities.

The time went surprisingly fast, I completed that particular job and four others before it was time to cleanup my desk and wait for Melody to pick me up. Donna confronted me asking if I liked what I was doing today.

“It was fun, even though a lot of it was mind numbing I enjoyed the work, quite happy when I completed one project and asked you for another. The time went quickly and soon it was time to finish and wait for Melody.”

Donna suggested that I see her first thing tomorrow morning before I head back to my old job. I suggest you wear something nicer, a cute hairstyle and some makeup would be nice too. If you can handle them a pair of heels add so much to the appearance of my staff. Now be good, and I will see you promptly at eight A.M. As I rose from the desk Melody peeked in the door and I walked with her out to the car. I repeated Donna’s conversation, Melody getting quite a smirk on her face afterward.

She drove me straight to the salon, where Mary was eagerly awaiting for my arrival. I got a hug from Melody and was left alone to be worked on by Mary. I started to complain about having nothing to eat all day, but Melody just smiled. “You need to lose a few pounds anyway, I am sure you will survive.”

Mary made sure that all facets of my masculine appearance were done away with. A feminine hairstyle, curls courtesy of some curlers and a liberal dousing of setting lotion. Some semi-permanent makeup, mainly lipstick and mascara, and two fresh piercings in each ear along with some cute earrings. Then over to their clothing store, where I was fitted with six very feminine outfits for work. Unfortunately all utilizing skirts and lacy blouses. I indeed looked feminine, no one would ever look at me and suggest I had ever been a member of the male gender.

I did see Donna early the next morning and now worked in her office, a kind of secretary doing little odd jobs for her as she saw fit. That lasted for a week before I was promoted to her P.A. a position I have held ever since.

Melody and I stayed with the lesbian arrangement, I get plenty of pleasure, and she adores her full size plaything. A lot of night time activity lasts until the early morning hours, usually requiring me to take a nap as soon as I get home from work so that I can function the next day at work. We did get lots of clothes, lingerie and shoes for the both of us, my male clothing sent to Goodwill.

Surprisingly my Dad took to Maggie, on one of their visits I was hugged from behind, and addressed as Princess. Mom smiled as he performed that maneuver, so I knew she had something to do with it. I was thrilled, to be loved as a daughter even better than as a son. From that day on we had a regular Father/Daughter relationship, me asking him for help and advice and he doting on me.

The biggest plus to all of this is how much closer Melody and I became. We shared everything in life, shopping, going out, chores around the house, and a vigorous romantic life. Getting a little more cleavage was the best thing to happen to me, I constantly thank Mary for her help in my foolish mistakes made that day, I do owe her a lot. Now to pick my evening gown for tonight, we are celebrating our anniversary, a special occasion. I wonder if the blue one will be the best or should I go with the green one.

So many decisions all starting with the stupid comments made to Melody about her getting a little more cleavage. I ended up with the cleavage, a fact that I am pleased about. I guess I will go with the green dress, being strapless a perfect match for my now impressive cleavage.

© 2016 thru 2024 by Francesca